having his arm wrapped around me,

is unbelievable warmth.



and when its not there.
there is an emptiness.



right now i am sick.
i havnt gone to work since wedns last week.
apart from friday. when i worked for 2.5hours. but most of that was me cry and having breakdowns

a) because my body was so exhausted.
and
b) because it was really busy,i had no energy. as i hadnt eaten in two days.
and i felt like throwing up, but i couldnt.

so all up, it was a great shift.


rose and bf are being especially good to me.
i am very lucky to hvae them both.



thank you rose.
and bf.




battery dying.


until next time


x

today is thursday.

i have a holiday from work.

which is A+
but i wish i had slightly more.

recently i have started at 5pm on mondays and tuesdays, because there have been no staff.
and also, it is just me and master, (as opposed to me, master and one other staff member), so the work load is a whole bunch more intense. and it also means i dont get to finish till 2am.
because there is no one else there.


the other days, i start at 6, and finish whenever.
sometimes i can leave early.
and its nice.


i am just trying really hard to save money so that my plan (not mentionable at this stage) can come into effect.
its not going so well.
and walking outside, i feel i must purchase something.
and today i spent 200 dollars i dont have (potentially more! gasp).

although, i did buy some new underwear. which is more than i would pay back home.
as there was no sale.
and i needed a new bra.

the lady measured me, and still brought me the completely wrong sized bra 3 times.
but in the end. i got one that i feel so happy in.
and its pink. and has cute hearts on it.

tehehe.

also made vegetarian burritos today.
it cost me a bomb, due to foreign ingredients.
but oh,
so,
worth it.


it made me miss vege nachos with han. (which was a regular thing back in nz before i left....)

my friend masa, who is from gifu, but lives in nagoya, recently got back from a half year exchange trip to australia.
on saturday, he came to osaka to visit.
it was so good to see him again!!!!!

tomorrow i will meet a girl, who also did the same thing with me last winter at a ski resort. we were in the same prefecture. but never met.
we emailed each other. and complained about how silly things were sometimes.

anyways, tomorrow she will come to osaka!
and i will go to meet her.

what else....
my mum sent my ecezma cream in the post last week. and it still hasnt come.

which is infuriating. because....
my hands are actually in ruins from work.
i cant really do anything.

pick up things, pull up my stockings (which i wear everyday), open cans or things like that.
messaging on my phone hurts too.

which is boooo.


so, hopefully it comes soon.


someone close to me is feeling very down at the moment. how do we think i can cheer this person up?
i think im doing everything i can to be supportive, and a good person.

but i would love to hear what you think could work.....


and in saying that,
i must go.


but more soon


x

today is monday

i went to bed quite late last night. well this morning. at about 5am.

i talked to han on skype. (again...)
i do this very regularly, and it makes me happyyyyyy.


i was also watching a video with my flatmate tommy, and his friend krishna.
it was about japanese hosts.
it was very very interesting.

i dont know what i think of them any more.

(also, when i say video, i mean a documentary)

i guess a foreigners perspective is different from a japanese persons anyways.
as japanese people grow up seeing them on the streets all the time.

anyways,
i highly recommend you watch it.
if you have the time.


today i start work at 5. boo.
this means i have to leave at 4.20.

which is soon.
as now is 3.45

i made curry for dinner.....
but i cant eat it
( i dont want to eat it?)
so i made it with meat.


bf still isnt home from work.


but he just called to say he will be home soon.

so. i best be off to prepare.



ciao.

x

ive decided to try make a better go at this

and when i say this.
i mean my blog.

updating my life. so that you can know.
and so that i wont forget.


so,
you can look foward to something to read, especially when exams are coming up in a few months.
plus lots of exciting assignments.


ok.

so,
big news number one: i am staying in japan officially till the end of feb next year. im so super excited. and happy. that my living in japan dream doesnt have to end just yet. but also sad. because it means i wont be able to see your pretty faces until longer away. booo.

big news number two: my cousin just had her second baby. a gorgeous little girl named mckenzie. on monday, very close to the tuesday boarder. i skyped them the other day. and she is just so little. and tiny. and makes me what babies. but only babies to play with for now.

news number three: mickey is in japan!!! he came on the 21st. and we hung out with him for the first time in over 10months yesterday. it was so weird and crazy. and reminded me of nz life. and semi maybe of me. well. the me i used to be before being wrapped up in this japanese world.

thing i would like to say four: living with my bf (still feels weird to write that), is making life very happy. although its not always picture perfect, its generally what a dream feels like. he is so easy to live with. and puts up with my crazy mood swings etc. have also become a very tidy clean person since living with him. our apartment is so lovely and neat and clean. that i want to keep it that way, and have nothing out of place. i never thought id say that i like doing the cooking and cleaning. yesterday we had our first major misunderstanding. which sucked. and i cried. but. its all ok now. and it was over a really silly thing.

point five: i hate that time of the month. because in recent months, it had made me become a unstable blabbering insecure girl. which is so not me.




cant keep eyes open. 4.30 am. sleeep.


x




p.s. welocme to my new followers....